


An Endless Abyss and Other Comforts

by orphan_account



Category: Fullmetal Alchemist - All Media Types, Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood & Manga
Genre: AU, Alternate Universe, Angst, Blushing, Comfort, Cuddling, F/M, Flirting, Fluff, Kissing, Lots of Angst, Pining, Protective Edward, Slightly Aged up, alphonse is just happy to be here bless his heart, angsty, edward is sad and someone needs to hold him, eventually, god someone hold these boys, gonne be long and have many chapters, lots of foreshadowing, possessive Edward, slight gore and violence but ill put warnings in the chapters, slowburn, slowly bc slowburn, things will be revealed about readers past, this gonna be angst fest, very slowburn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-05
Updated: 2020-08-28
Packaged: 2021-03-03 18:55:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 13,505
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24550432
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Edward Elric’s return to you was not warmly welcomed. After joining the State Alchemists- and up and leaving his hometown, and you, unexpectedly- dear Edward returns to Resembool, newly uniformed and seeking advice.You come from a long line of very talented, very well known alchemists, currently residing within the Rockbell residence. Only dabbling yourself, you are confused as to why Edward wants your help, and your confusion will only grow.Shenanigans ensue.
Relationships: Ed/Reader - Relationship, Edward Elric/Reader, Edward/Reader
Comments: 28
Kudos: 72





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is gonna be long, and tags will be heavily updated as I go along, cause I do be improvising tho. Slowburn kinda, lots of pining. Got some plans for this baby. Enjoy!! If you have requests for future chapters or any events you would like mentioned specifically just let me know!!

The sweet scent of rain, wet dirt and an evening breeze gently wafted into the open window, ruffling cotton curtains, and cooling you off laying inside, thin nightgown barely covering soft thighs. The last light of the setting sun lighting up the room with a warm glow, the star framed by small tufts of cotton candy clouds. A soft jazzy tune flowed through the speaker of the busted radio sitting on your nightstand and you laid on your stomach, flipping through a magazine- Automail Today, on loan from Winry- fiddling with the silver charm attached to the long cord around your neck. You cocked your head to the side, sighing.

A ‘ding!’ sounded from downstairs, the doorbell, startling you. You rolled off the bed, padding towards the door, creaking it open and tip toeing down the hall, decending the wooden steps. You flicked on your living room light, releasing the deadbolt on the heavy door and pulling it open, a tall- well, taller than you- figure stood in the frame.

“Uh.. Hey”

You recoiled, knees nearly buckling. The blond slowly placed a hand on the back of his head, offering a hesitant and awkward smile. You regained your balance and stared, your face blank.

Finally, after what felt like months just staring into his face, you stomped towards the male, stopping a foot away from him. You could smell his colonge- rosewood- you shoved that thought aside, anger bubbling in your stomach like a magma pit.

“Edward Elric- you goddamn idiot!” You nearly screeched, “You leave me for months, alone, no call, no nothing?! I had to find out from Pinako, Edward! She’s been worried sick!”

While Ed loved hearing you speak his name, he couldn’t help but cringe at your tone, and felt a rising guilt creeping through his body. You were shaking with anger, your brows were scrunched together and you could feel your nails digging into your palms.

“I just can’t believe- you- you-“ You sputtered, tensing your shoulders, slaming your eyes shut and rubbing circles around your temples. “Fuck!”

Ed’s face pulled into a deep frown. He felt the hot guilt finally fill his body and he sucked in a breath, muttering your name. “Look- I’m sorry. I really am. I should have explained to you why I had to go.”

You crossed your arms over your chest, a glare settling over your features. You didn’t speak, Ed took that as permission to continue.

“It’s a really long story.. I promise I can explain everything.” He almost whispered. “Can I come in? Please?”

You felt the hot tears of anger start to brim your eyes, and your veins burned. You forced out a deep sigh and stepped to the side. Ed stepped into the threshold, stepping gingerly to the sofa against the far wall. You slammed the door and followed Ed, taking a seat and resting your arms crossed across your chest.

You felt the warm tears start to spill over, and you looked away from Ed as he took a seat beside you. 

He breathed your name, you could hear the guilt, and part of you felt bad for being happy he felt guilty. He said your name again.

“I’m sorry, I really am-“

“You’re sorry? For what Edward, tell me. Do you feel guilty? At all?” You spat, refusing to face him. You settled for shooting him an angry glance out of the corner of your eye.

You could sense his temper beginning to show, but you didn’t face him.

“I- I had to go, okay? I had no other choice- Damnit, will you just look at me?!” He snapped.

You felt white hot anger start to pump through your body, and you reeled on him.

“You listen to me, Elric. I was alone. We were alone. For months, because you left. You had a choice, you had options but you chose to go- go and do what? Join the State Alchemists? And what about Alphonse, huh?! Where even is he?” You felt tears nearly burn as they drifted down your cheeks, you didn’t realize you were crying until you felt hot tears drip down your front, blooming into damp spots on your nightgown. Ed’s face twisted into something between fury and guilt, you thought he looked like a child again.

“You left Pinako, Winry, and me. You left us. You’re lucky neither of them are here- Lord..” You rested your elbows on your knees and covered your eyes with your palms.

Ed pressed his lips into a thin line, fists balled in his lap. “I left because there was nothing left for me here. Al.. He’s not a part of the State Alchemists, we saw Winry and Pinako in town, shopping, or whatever, and he wanted to walk them back.” He muttered, his voice was just above a whisper.

You took your head out of your hands and straighted your back, face sticky from tears and you noted how cold it had suddenly become, shivering. You turned to face the blond, mouth twisting into a sad smile. Ed’s face relaxed, lips still pulled into a frown. You thought you saw his eyes gloss, but ignored it. 

“You should get some sleep.” You rose from your seat, smoothing your nightgown. “I’m sure you know where your room is.”

“Wait-“

“Please, Edward, I don’t want to talk about it anymore. I’m happy you’re back, I am, but I can’t fight right now.” You whispered.

Ed rose from his seat and watched you glide out of the room. He covered his face with his hands, the cold metal of his prosthesis cooled his damp forehead and he groaned, frustrated. 

Meanwhile, upstairs in your room, you sniffled and lay on your back on the cold wood floors. After screaming at Ed you felt your anger slowly evaporate, and in its place an empty pit. You were still young, Ed only older by a few months, and you knew that you shouldn’t have been as angry as you were; but the State Alchemists? Really? You knew how people felt about the military, you sharing the same opinions as your peers. You couldn’t fathom what had gone through their heads. Ed especially, of all people.

You heard a distant thud, and a muffled yell, knowing Pinako and Winry had returned home just as the sun completely sank below the horizon. You heard Ed’s laugh and your heart ached. 

No. No no no. You thought, resting your hand over your heart. I am not doing this again. 

You sat up, tossing on a thin knit sweater, and slipped out of your room and down the stairs once again, plastering on a delighted smile.

Pinako called your name as you came into view, Alphonse’s armor towered above everyone, he stood in the corner. He gave a small wave.

“Don’t be rude, come welcome the boys. Ed had gone ahead of us, did you hear him come in?” The old woman asked. You shook your head.

“No, I was asleep, I just got up when I heard everyone come in.” You smiled at everyone, even Ed, and turned. “I’ll put on a pot of tea.”

You turned to leave before anyone could call you back, once you turned the corner out of view, you covered your face in your hands and let out a shaky sigh. Tears welled up once again, and you uncovered your face, allowing them to spill over, quietly crying to yourself.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you guys for the comments on last chapter!! I’m so happy you guys are enjoying so far, and I hope you enjoy this chapter just as much! I’ll be updating as much as I can, and as often as I can.

Edward felt guilty. Not the kind of guilt you felt after swiping a candy from the drugstore; the kind of guilt that radiates, filling your body and making it hard to think. You didn’t deserve the hand you were delt, he knew this, but when he made his choice, every inch of him agreed that he wouldn’t be able to leave if he saw you. You were ethreal. Edward couldn’t look you in the eye sometimes, your gaze made him feel small, like he would shrink into a speck of dust with a simple glance. He thought you were the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen- and you scared the shit out of him.

Edward felt guilty, and he knew you were angry, he knew you had every right to be; but when you looked at him, hot tears spilling over blushing cheeks, he felt like he could shatter into a million pieces. He did that to you, and the weight of leaving, what happened to his mother— what he did, everything ate him up alive. 

Edward’s gaze followed you everywhere. Winry teased him for staring, he always played it off annoyed, but deep down he didn’t mind. Part of him felt that her teasing meant you felt the same for him, not that he’d ever reveal how he felt out loud. Ed’s insecurities would never allow that, and you were an enigma to him, anyways. Ever changing, molding.

Edward’s unwelcome return to you had not been completely unexpected, making the reason he returned that much harder to navigate around. He thought if anyone knew about the Philosophers Stone, it would be you. But your parents died years ago, you had told them, and your limited knowledge on alchemy was hit or miss. Edward was worried, everytime he thought about asking you for help, or the Stone, or being a State Alchemist he felt like having a stroke, especially with your silence after your loving reunion.

It had only been a day and a half, but you felt like caving in on yourself. You normally would talk to Ed everyday, he would teach you things about alchemy he learned from his dads journals, and you would show him old tricks, things your parents would practice. You would sneak a listen at their conversations, whispers through hallways. That’s the alchemy you knew, things that hadn’t been taught in decades. You knew Ed ate it up, he loved the attention, mostly. You could tell.

Going this long without talking to Edward though, made your head hurt. He was your best friend and you really cared about him. Going so long without speaking to him felt like you couldnt breathe. You nearly caved, seeing him in the kitchen the next morning, coffee cup in his hand, leaning on the counter in a tank top and shorts; blond hair out of its usual braid, framing his handsome face— Oh lord.

You had panicked, turned on your heel, and left. 

It had been a day and a half. A new record for your silent treatment, and you wanted to cave so, so badly. But you were far too stubborn for that. You would watch him and Alphonse spar in the yard and nearly forget why you weren’t speaking to him in the first place.

Finally, at the end of the second day, you ran into him on the way to your bedroom, turning a corner and running face first into his shoulder.

“Oh,” He muttered, “Hey.”

You froze where you stood, battling yourself mentally, every part of you seemed to be screaming, “Just talk to him! Do it!”

You looked up at him and— Oh, his eyes.

“Hey.” You said, suddenly loosing yourself in his gaze.

“You’re.. Talking to me again.”

“Oh- Uh, yeah. I just figured I had punished you enough, I suppose.” You said suddenly, straightening yourself.

“I would hope so.” Edward felt a smile tug at his lips but he fought it off and nodded.

You shifted silently.

“So....” Edward said.

“I’ll be going to bed now.” You said quickly. “Goodnight, Edward.”

He didn’t have time to reply, before you quickly padded off. He watched you disappear into your room, and didn’t look away until your door shut. Ed smiled wide, turning on his heels towards his own room, Alphonse seated on the bed parallel to his.

“What are you smiling for?” Al questioned.

“She’s talking to me again.” Edward replied, sitting on his bed.

Alphonse shifted, armor clinking. He spoke just above a whisper. “Maybe she couldn’t hold out on you because she likes you?”

Ed froze in his seated position, eyebrow twitching. Al continued.

“I mean, she does seem nervous around you, even when we were kids.”

Edward sputtered, then shook his head, body regaining movement. “Go to sleep, Al.” He rolled over, back to his sibling.

“Yeah, I’ll just do that.” Al joked. “Goodnight, Brother.”

“Goodnight, Al.”

Edward hoped the blush coating his cheeks wasn’t visible as he reached across the mattress to shut off the bedside lamp.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you guys again for such sweet comments on last chapter, you guys are making this even more fun to write and I love reading what you have to say!!! Enjoy and thank you guys so much!!

For the first time since the Elric brothers return, you felt normal. You were speaking to Edward again, albeit reluctantly, cursing yourself for caving simply because he looked you in the eye, but things were normal. That was all that mattered to you now.

You were seated in between the two boys on the front lawn, both yours and Edwards bodies overshadowed by Alphonse’s armor, but the shade was cool and you were with your boys again, so you didn’t mind. A breeze ruffled your skirt, spread out around you like a blanket; the air smelled like freshly cut grass and newly cleaned cotton sheets.

Bliss.

The screen door opened and closed, Winry stepping into your view with lemonade for three. Things were good. 

Too good... You thought. Nothing ever goes this well for this long without somebody loosing a limb.

Edward cleared his throat.

Oh, great. There’s the missing limb. You thought.

“So, Winry,” Edward started, saying your name but not looking at you, “Al and I are going to be leaving soon, for Central.”

You felt like ripping the tree across the yard out of the ground and smashing Edward to death with it— like a cockroach. But you settled for sighing and smoothing your blouse, fighting off the urge to commit manslaughter.

Winry sighed as well, seemingly very calm. You mentally applauded her patience. “I suppose that’s fine... But you better be gone for a long time, if you’re back here with my ruined arm and leg any sooner than next year, I’ll kill you where you stand.”

Nevermind.

Edward let out a nervous laugh, eyes flicking back and forth between Winry and you. He was surprised at your silence, but chose not to question it at risk of being ‘killed where he stood’. He made the mistake of meeting your eyes, and felt himself develop a heart condition.

“When are you guys leaving?” You suddenly asked, breaking your mini-staring contest.

“Tomorrow afternoon. We got train tickets.” Alphonse answered, doing what could only be interpreted as a glance, at Edward.

The silence was deafening.

Suddenly, you stood. You smoothed your hair and smiled. “We should prepare a nice dinner.”

Ed and Al looked at each other. Winry seemed taken aback, even, but smiled and nodded. “I think that’s a great idea.”

Apparently, you were very good at diverting the conversation.

You and Winry skipped back into the house, leaving the boys to fear for their safety.

“Do you think they’re going to try to poison us?” Edward asked.

Alphonse shrugged. “You’re the only one who can eat, brother. I think I’ll be fine.”

Edward pursed his lips. “Write me a nice eulogy.”

You and Winry occupied the kitchen, you were chopping vegetables, Winry stirring a pot of broth. She opened her mouth to speak, but paused.

“You aren’t angry at Ed and Al?” She asked.

You looked at her, frowning. 

“No, not now anyway.” You paused, then turned back to your vegetables. “I should be but I’m not. I think I’m just used to the idea.. To an extent.”

“That makes sense.”

You set the knife down on the wooden cutting board. “Do you think I’m being stupid? Being so upset they left without telling me?”

Winry shook her head and smiled knowingly. “I don’t think you’re angry because they left without telling you, I think it’s more so... Ed didn’t tell you he was leaving.”

You whipped around to face the blonde, your face suddenly very warm.

“I- Why would I- You just shut up and stir your broth.” You spat, avoiding eye contact. Winry laughed and shook her head.

“You’ve always been closer to Ed than I’ve ever been, I meant, that as a close friend to another, it may have been upsetting.” She continued. “Though your reaction told me everything I need to know.”

You groaned and crossed your arms, hoping Winry couldn’t see your red face, then turned on your heel.

“Hey wait, where are you going? We need to finish dinner!”

“I feel a little faint, I think I should lie down.” You said, sarcasm dripping from your words. “I trust you’ll be fine without me.”

You turned before Winry could object, and marched off to your room, closing your door and laying flat on your mattress. The window allowed for a cool, dry breeze to waft in, and you could hear the rustling of leaves and grass. You were just happy to have a moment of silence, allowing you to think.

The stir of others in the house drew your attention from the open window to the far wall. You sighed.

Your boy- boys, plural- were leaving and there wasn’t a thing you could do about it. You didn’t know how long they would be gone, and if they would return in one piece or not.

Or alive. You suddenly thought. Shut up brain.

You sat up and moved to close the window, it was nearly dusk and the hills were washed with yellow light. In the distance, you saw black plumes of smoke rising from the train station, the machines tail end disappearing in the ocean of distant buildings. You something stir in your belly, and gears started moving in your head.

“What if...” You muttered to yourself.

The trains horn bellowed.

The lightbulb in your head turned on and you tore ass, running out of your room and down the hall towards the boy’s room. You knocked.

Edward opened the door, he smiled at you, puzzled, saying your name. Before he continued you put your hands on his shoulders.

“What if I went with you, with you and Alphonse, to Central. I haven’t been out of Resembool in years, anyway, and we wouldn’t have to be apart for so long again.” You said, rapidfire.

“Hold on.” Edward started, smile faltering. “You want to come to Central?”

You grinned. “Yes! I can come with you, I’m sure you have a place there, and I have some money saved from doing jobs around town, I could use it for a train ticket!” You released the boys shoulders from your grip.

“I don’t know. It’s dangerous, it’s not just hanging around and sight seeing—“

“I know, I won’t bother you when youre on assignments or whatever it is you do, and I’ll just go with you places and I’ll do the sight seeing and you guys can work!” Your hands flew around gesturing wildly, “It’s perfect!”

Edward opened his mouth to speak but was quickly inturrupted by Alphonse, towering above his brother. 

“Maybe it isn’t such a bad idea after all, brother.” He started. “It would be like taking a piece of home with us, and she would be a great addition to the team.”

You gestured to Alphonse, grinning. Edwards face twisted into something you couldn’t read. He sucked in a breath.

“Please, Edward.” You whispered.

He released a deep sigh and nodded. “Fine- But you stay with us at all times, and you have to cook, sometimes.”

You nodded and squealed, throwing your arms around Ed’s neck, cheeks pink. He gently patted your back, hoping nobody could feel the hot blush crawling up his neck.

You released him from your grip and spun around, smiling. “And I don’t even mind cooking for you guys, you are pretty hopeless.” You laughed, and turned, taking off to find Pinako.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am updating earlier than normal, I had some very neat ideas for this chapter...... Maybe a touch of foreshadowing? And I also would like to thank the people commenting on each chapter, your words mean so much and make me damn near cry when I read them. (Dramatic much? @ me) Enjoy!!!!

Edward watched you pack from your doorway, you were rambling about some kind of tourist attraction in Central you heard about over the radio, carefully folding the clothes piled onto your bed, laying them into your suitcase. To Edward, your speech was muffled, he only saw your lips moving; his mind was drifting to the new plan of you going with the Elrics to Central, and the anxiousness he felt gripping his chest.

You moved to your dresser, and grabbed the small wooden box resting on top- a jewelry box, full of necklaces and rings; they were your mothers, you had said once- placing it next to the slowly shrinking pile of clothes on your mattress. You glided over to the nightstand on the other side of the bed, gently grabbing the frame placed face down on the table; taking out the picture and sliding it down the side of your suitcase. Edward noticed part of the picture was missing.

“What’s that?” He asked.

“A picture of my mom.” You replied, avoiding his eyes. You smoothed your hair with one hand, making sure the photo was secure with the other.

Edward silently wondered where the other half of the picture went, and what was on it; but that was a question for another time. Your parents were always a tough topic for you. You spoke about your mother fondly, sometimes telling stories of her and the alchemy she taught you. As for your father, you never mentioned him; you hardly remembered him, only that he left your family when you were a child.

You placed the last of your clothes into the suitcase, latching it closed. You pulled the case off the bed, it hit the floor, and you, glowing smile stretched across your cheeks, stood with your hands on your hips. Edward cleared his throat.

“Need any help?” He asked, gesturing to your, overfilled, suitcase.

“Oh no,” You started, “I got it. Plus your baby muscles would never be able to carry it all the way to the station.”

“Hey! I’m not a baby!” 

“Okay, okay.”

You laughed, face suddenly flushed, and picked up your enormous suitcase; Edward stepped out of your way, you wobbling into the hallway towards the stairs.

“Are you sure you don’t want me to carry it down the stairs, at least?” Ed asked.

“No, Edward, I got it. I’m perfectly capable—“

Your argument was cut short, the suitcase swayed your balance and you stumbled towards the staircase; you screwed your eyes shut, arms flying wildly, the suitcase falling from your grip and tumbling down the steps. Edward jumped forward, grabbing your arm with one hand, and wrapping the other around your midsection.

You let out a breath you didn’t realize you were holding in, your back pressed against Edwards chest. You felt your neck get warmer, his breath brushing over your ear.

“You idiot!” He said suddenly, grabbing onto your shoulders and turning you to face him. “You could have gotten yourself hurt, you should have just let me carry it!”

Your eyes were wide, the adrenaline still pumping through your body, you scanned Edward’s face, his brows were scrunched, nearly meeting in the center of his forehead. He didn’t look angry, worry, instead, was written on his features.

“Jeez, Edward.” You muttered, fighting off the tightness of your chest. You forced your words to come out clearly. “It was just my suitcase that fell, I’m lucky you were nearby.”

Ed sighed, releasing your shoulders. You tried to brush off the rising anxiety in your core, smoothing your blouse.

Edward started down the steps, grabbing various articles of clothing that had fallen out of the case after its tumble. You smoothed your skirt and took a deep breath, decending the stairs after the blond.

The train station was nearly empty. The three of you had taken a seat on a bench by the tracks, Alphonse insisted upon carrying your luggage, the suit of armor seemed to help with heavy lifting. The town was quiet, despite being the early afternoon.

The silence of the station seemed to deafen you, you shifted uncomfortably on the wooden bench. You hated travelling, ever since you were a child. You travelled all the time with your mother, she would travel Amestris to teach Old Alchemy, she always told you, but you didn’t like the constant moving, different schools, houses, people. You liked consistency. Maybe that’s why you were so angry Edward and Alphonse had left— they disrupted the consistency your life had taken on. Even though you hated travelling, your boys provided enough consistency to satisfy you. Hopefully. You felt a pit settle in your stomach, and smoothed your skirt, twice, then placed your hands under your thighs.

In the distance, a train horn bellowed, Edward opened his silver pocketwatch, checking the time.

“This is us.” He said, standing.

You and Al followed suit, Al picking up yours and Edwards suitcases. You offered a sympathetic smile. 

“Alphonse, I can carry my case, if you would like.”

Al shook his head.

“No, no, not after you almost fell down the stairs; besides, its nothing to me”

You heard the smile in his voice, and blushed, realizing he heard about your near death experience. You wondered if Edward had told him.

‘Or if he told him about how he held you.’ You thought. ‘And how you could smell his cologne, and the way he breathed in your ear—‘

‘Stop that.’ You thought, suddenly. ‘Shut up. None of that.’

The train screeched to a halt in front of your trio, doors opening to reveal a worn interior. You filed in with the boys, taking a seat in a small booth-like area. Alphonse unloaded the cases into the baggage area and sat next to you, Edward sitting parallel. The train pulled out of the station not long after, and you placed your head on the windowsill, falling into a fitful sleep.

You were running. That’s all you knew.

You could see your breath as you panted, nearly stumbling on something you couldn’t see. Your name was called behind you, but a voice rang out before you could look.

“Run! Don’t look back! Go!”

A mans voice, it sounded familiar, but you couldn’t place where you’d heard it. You listened, and continued running. Bangs and pops rang out, suddenly, you kept running, flashes of light illuminating your path.

You stumbled, closing your eyes waiting for the sharp pain of gravel, only for it to never come. You opened your eyes again, now in, what looked like, a desert, during the day. 

Your name was called again, you turned in circles, trying to find the source, until a figure appeared in the distance— a woman.

“Mom?” You called, realizing how young your sounded, you looked down.

You couldn’t have been more than five, small, bare feet attached to chubby legs. You wore a tattered white gown.

Your name was called again, this time it was a man’s, a different man, it echoed, as though being called from the sky.

Your eyes snapped open, the train car was still mostly empty, and Edward was leaning close to you.

“You okay?” He asked.

“What? Yeah, why wouldn’t I be?” You muttered, sitting up in your seat. You rubbed your eyes.

“You were groaning in your sleep a bunch. Must’ve been a bad dream, huh?”

You nodded, suddenly remembering the details of your dream, feeling almost like a memory.

“Yeah... Just a dream.” You whispered.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is shorter than normal, my apologies, but I’ll make sure the next one is extra long :) enjoy!

You were able to drift in and out of sleep along the ride, the violent rocking didn’t allow for any dreams to plague you, which you were thankful for.

Once you had been shaken awake for a final time, the sun had set completely. City lights glittered at a distance, the rest of the scattered structures in the valley were bathed in a mellow moonlight. Your finger traced along the glass, gliding over the foliage sprinting past the train.

You heard a groan from the seat across from you, Edward was sprawled across his seat, red coat folded underneath his head.

“He looks like a baby.” You murmured.

“Yeah, he’s calm when he sleeps.” Alphonse laughed, you nearly jumped a foot in the air, forgetting he sat beside you.

“Edward is so angry when he’s awake.” You replied, gently elbowing his arm. “How could one person that small be so angry?”

“You’re one to talk.” Edward mumbled, eyes still closed. His eyebrow twitched.

You felt your soul leave your body, Alphonse froze.

“Oh... Brother, you’re awake.” 

“Yeah, that’s probably good, I think we are close— to the city.” You coughed.

Edward sat up, eyebrow twitching. He stretched, then looked out the window.

The city was nearer now, lights gleaming even brighter as you grew closer. You had been all over Amestris, but your mother never let you stay in Central City for very long, you were never allowed out during the day, and you always wondered why; your mother leaving it to be one of many unanswered questions.

You felt anxiety start to claw at the back of your neck, and make your chest feel tight.

Was there a reason that she didn’t want me out all the time? You thought.

The lurch of the train pulling into a large brick station halted your thoughts. You felt lucky it was night, memories of your childhood suddenly returning, and the anger your mother would show when you went out during the day. It was one of the only times she had ever hit you. You shook that memory out of your head, like water from your ear after swimming.

Alphonse pulled yours and Edwards luggage from the storage above your seats with a thud. You got up from your seat, following the brothers off the train and onto the platform. The station was completely indoors, with high concrete ceilings and decorated metal beams. Tall narrow windows lined the length of the structure, both sides of the platform, from what you could see, were empty, except for a few stragglers exiting the train.

You spun in a small circle, trying to take everything in, eyes wide. You breathed in every detail, the air smelled like smoke and oil.

“Ah! The Elric Brothers!” A deep, deafening voice called. You turned, easily spotting the speaker.

Before you stood the most burly, gargantuan man you had ever seen. He had to have been at least nine feet tall, from where you were standing; and completely bald, aside from a magnificent mustache, and a small tuft of hair at the top of his head, perfectly curled. He wore the blue uniform of a military officer, and had the brightest blue eyes to match.

“Oh jeez—“ Edward murmured, rubbing the back of his head, frowning.

“Hello, Major.” Alphonse greeted.

“Hello, Alphonse. Oh! And who is this, lovely young woman you’ve brought with you—?” The man, major something-or-other, said.

You introduced yourself with a smile and a slight bow of the head. The man let out a hearty chuckle, and bowed deeply, one arm stretched across his chest. He suddenly popped back up, an arm extended into the air, the other, flexed by his chest.

“I am Major Alex Louise Armstrong— Known as the Strong Arm Alchemist!” Major Armstrong declared. He drew his arms back, flexing, again. He seemed to glitter and shine when he spoke; you almost couldn’t look directly at him. “It’s a pleasure! Any friend of the Elric Brothers, is a friend of mine!”

“It’s wonderful to meet you, Major Armstrong.” You laughed nervously, but smiled, holding out your hand. The Major took it, completely consuming your hand in his massive palm, very gently shaking it. He met your eyes and hesitated.

“Hey, Major.” Edward greeted, finally, both hands resting at the back of his head.

“Hello, Edward.” The major replied, “I take it you’ve not yet met with Colornel Mustang?”

“No not yet. We had to make a detour on our way to Resembool.”

“It would be my pleasure to accompany you to Headquarters,” Armstrong replied, “I have a car waiting.”


	6. Chapter 6

Central City headquarters was bigger than you had imagined. Monstrous stone building wrapped around a lush courtyard. It was hard to take in at night, you felt a pit form in your stomach upon noticing the soldiers prowling the area.

Edward, Alphonse and Major Armstrong lead the way, making polite conversation, inaudible to you. You tagged behind, pit in your stomach growing, feeling like you had swallowed a grapefruit. You smoothed your hair.

The interior of the building was far more boring than the awe-inspiring exterior, you thought. Plain walls lined with various cork boards covered in papers, or framed photos of officers. When you entered, directly in front of you, sat a portait of King Bradley.

A memory popped into your head of one of your mother’s distasteful rants about the Fuhrer, remembering vividly the colorful words she used to describe him. She was not a very big fan, you didn’t understand until you grew older.

Your name was called by Edward, knocking you back into the present, he gestured with his hand for you to hurry up, the three alchemists halfway down a corridor. Your heart skipped a beat, and you jogged to catch up, matching their pace just steps behind, Alphonse slowed down to walk beside you, until you all reached a large door, with a plaque reading:

Colonel Roy Mustang  
Central Command

Your palms began to sweat. Alphonse softly called your name, patting you on the shoulder.

“Why don’t you sit out here for a moment? We won’t be long.” The boy asked, you imagined if he had a normal body he would be smiling.

“Yeah, of course.” You nodded, brushing your blouse flat across your chest. You took a seat on the bench a few feet from the door.

The men entered, leaving you alone. 

Roy Mustang was in a usual bad mood, face pulled into a scowl, hands folded across his desk. Today was not his day, and he was not looking forward to meeting with the Elric brothers, already having to work overtime. Neglecting his paperwork was beginning to catch up to him, especially after his recent transfer to Central.

The opening of the door didn’t pull his gaze from the papers scattered across his view, he let out a quiet sigh, and instead unfolded his hands.

“Hello, Colonel.” Edward greeted, taking a seat on one of the sofas in the center of the room.

“Fullmetal.” Roy replied, now looking up to see Armstrong hovering in front of the, now closed, door.

“Any luck?” Roy continued, turning his glare onto Edward.

“She wasn’t exactly happy to see me.” Edward muttered, “I didn’t have a chance to ask about the Stone.” 

“She came with us to Central, though.” Al interjected.

Roy cocked an eyebrow.

“She’s here?” 

“Yes, in the hall.”

“And it’s true?”

Edward’s eyes rolled to the ceiling.

“Yes, she’s Ishvalan.” Major Armstrong coughed.

Roy nodded. Ed’s eyes moved to the door. He pictured you sitting in the hall alone, and frowned.

“It’s not often Ishvalan people wed outside of their own people.” Roy stated, matter-of-factly. “I assume she doesn’t realize—“

“Of course she knows she’s Ishvalan.” Edward scoffed, he sat forward in his seat, eyes hard. 

“She’s lived in Resembool for years now, nobody really pays any attention to her. She hasn’t experienced the effects of the war firsthand, she barely remembers anything about her childhood. Everyone in town knows who her mother was, so they don’t give her a hard time.” Alphonse explained.

Roy’s eyes glided over to the blond, gears turning. 

“It’s not that big a deal.” Edward spat, growing irritable. His eyebrow twitched. “She’s not some freak.”

Roy’s eyes narrowed. He turned his gaze to Armstrong.

“Did you make the pitstop Major Armstrong suggested?” 

Edward glanced sideways at Roy, then at Alphonse.

“Yes, Doctor Marcoh.”

“He gave us this.” Edward reached unto a pocket on the inside of his coat, pulling out a folded paper.

Armstrong took it, placing it on Roy’s desk. He unfolded it, reading the writing scrawled on the paper.

“His work is in the first branch.”

Roy and Armstrong met eyes. The Major shook his head.

“There’s a room ready for you and your friend in the hall. Major Armstrong will escort you.”

With a curt not Armstrong stepped back into the hall, Edward and Alphonse rose from their seats, slightly confused, following the Major into the hall, where you sat, studying the floor.

The door opening and heavy footsteps pulled your focus. Four men exited the room, the unfamilar one wore the same uniform as Major Armstrong. His hair and eyes were black, gloved hands intertwined across his front, his eyes met yours and he stepped forward.

“Colonel Roy Mustang.” He said, holding out a hand. His glove had a transmutation circle embroidered in red thread across the back.

You gently took his hand in your own, bowing your head slightly, and introducing yourself.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you.” Roy released your hand and gave a nod.

Your eyes examined his gloves, disdain apparent on your features.

The rest of the evening went by slowly. You mind crept back to Mustang’s white gloves. You knew he was the Flame Alchemist, and you knew what he was capable of— what he had done. It made your neck grow sweaty.

Something in this city didn’t sit right with you. Whether it was Mustang, or forces you were not yet familiar of— you would find out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And Reader’s background is slightly uncovered— hopefully you guys enjoyed these last two chapters, Ive been getting busy lately so updates may be slower but they WILL come.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys!! I’m so so sorry for such a late update!! I had some health issues (not coronavirus, and I’m much better now!!) so I wasn’t able, and hadn’t felt up to writing, updates will come much more regularly now, and they will be MUCH longer than this!!! I hope you guys enjoy this chapter, and thank you so much for sticking with me!!!

You knew they were talking about you without needing to listen. Edward told you they didn’t, and you let him believe you didn’t know. Not that it really bothered you— But the anxiety of being in Central was getting to you, a bad feeling rooted in your stomach. Being out of Resembool for the first time in years, and going straight from your small town to Central, of all places, was jarring to say the least... But you felt touched Edward tried to make you think you hadn’t been a topic of discussion, albeit slightly irritated. You weren’t a child; but the way that the Colonel looked at you— into your eyes, like you were some kind of puzzle, or a zoo animal— made your intestines twist into knots, so you felt slightly grateful he wanted to shield you from it.

Edward and Alphonse had a room next to yours in the government barracks, you could hear them softly speaking through the wall, their words unintelligable. You rolled over on the stiff cot, trying to make out the muffled conversation on the other side of the wall. A part of you felt comforted being able to hear them talking softly, it reminded you that you weren’t alone.

You were used to being alone, not that you enjoyed it, you moved around constantly as a child, you weren’t allowed out much either, and it was just you and your mother; creating a lonely childhood. It took you a long time to understand why you moved so much, it hitting you one day as you watched another house disappear in the back window of your mothers vehicle. You were an Ishvalan child, with your Ishvalan widow of a mother, alone. The unrest in Ishval was prominent for years after you and your mother left, not that you had any memory of it, and the tension between Ishvalans and the rest of Amestrian citizens didn’t seem like it would be going away anytime soon, some children you met travelling didn’t even know Ishval had existed so recently, their limited knowledge creating the idea of Ishval being a whole different world, and maybe for them, it was.

Something stirred in your stomach and your thoughts drifted to your father. You never knew him, your mother hardly spoke of the man, though, sometimes if you were having trouble sleeping, she would cradle you in her arms and speak of the tall, mysterious stranger who came to Ishval, and how in love he and your mother were; and how from that love, you were made. He left when you were very young, his face wasn’t something so easily conjured in your mind, no matter how hard you tried; but you remembered his voice, his whispers to your mother in the night, his alchemy notes and books strewn across the floor of your living room; and the silver pocketwatch you only caught glimpses of. The only thing you had to connect yourself to him, now, was your alchemy. The bit you dabbled in, anyway.

Your head pounded and you felt a tightness in your chest; you scowled.

A soft knock sounded from across the cramped room, tossing you back into reality, the door creeping open to reveal a blond head. 

“Hey.” Edward spoke softly.

“Hey..” You whispered.

“I wanted to check on you, see if you’ve eaten.”

You sat up and nodded, smoothing your hair. You cleared your throat and gestured to the foot of the cot.

“You can come in and sit down,” You offered, “I don’t bite, Edward.”

He chuckled and stepped into the room, gently shutting the door behind him. He didn’t wear his usual red coat, you imagined he wouldn’t be sleeping much, if it were this late and he still wore his normal black ensemble instead of pajamas. Edward took a few steps forward, quickly reaching the cot and sitting near the end, hands on his knees. 

“So,” He began, “I bet it’s weird being in central, huh?”

You allowed a small smile to grace your features, scooting closer to him, slightly, and hugging your knees to your chest. The blankets material was rough and scratchy over your legs.

You sighed and nodded. “It feels really weird. I was so adamant to go with you guys, part of me never stopped to think that this is really Central.”

He looked at you, seemingly studying your features. You turned your head towards the small window near the cot and pretended not to notice, pursing your lips.

Edward examined your face, taking in your features and trying to read you. He felt bad for bringing you to headquarters right off the train, he had hoped you could have at least had a nights rest before... Well, he hoped you wouldn’t have had to have been subject of conversation with his superior at all, especially not while you sat alone, in the hallway. His eyebrow twitched and he turned to face the door.

“Sorry about Mustang..” He murmured. “He’s an ass, he hadn’t seen an Ishvalan since.. Well—“

“I know, Edward.” You muttered, turning to face him. He turned back around and met your eyes. “It’s alright. I don’t know much about my mothers religion, or the history of... Anything. But I know that it’s not common for Ishvalans to wed outside of their people.”

Edward’s face remained unreadable, you took notice of how close he was to you and felt your cheeks grow warm, you hoped the dim lighting made the blush settling over your face invisible.

“Yeah, well, he didn’t need to act like you were some attraction at a circus.” He spat, growing irritated. “I mean— You’re a person.”

You giggled and unwrapped an arm from around your knees, placing a soft hand on his shoulder, you could feel how cool the metal prosthetic was through his shirt. He met your eyes again, you noticed the pink dusted across his cheeks.

“It’s fine, really.” You said softly, moving your legs back down, scooting to match Edward’s position.

Edwards face felt warm, and after you removed your hand from his shoulder, he swore he could feel a burning handprint in its wake. He watched you move, eyes softened now. You leaned a head on his shoulder, the metal was hard against your cheek through the thin fabric of his top, but you didn’t mind; leaning into Edward. You saw his hands tense under white gloves, and sighed softly.

“That can’t be comfortable.” He whispered, barely able to raise the volume of his voice.

“No,” You replied, voice equally hushed. “It’s alright.”

You could feel his warm breath fan your forehead, and you looked up to meet his gaze, your faces barely a foot apart. Both of your cheeks were pink, and you peered at him through long lashes. 

“Thank you.” You breathed.

“What for?” 

“For checking in on me.”

Edward turned, jutting out his bottom lip and trying his best to harden his features.

“Of course, you idiot.” He murmured.

You smiled and sat up straight, removing your cheek from his shoulder. Your neck felt hot, but you ignored it.

“I suppose we should both be going to bed now.”

He glanced at you and nodded, rising from his seated position and peering down at you.

“Goodnight.” Edward said, speaking your name.

“Goodnight, Edward... Tell Alphonse I say goodnight to him, as well.”

Edward only nodded, walking towards the door. As he opened it and stepped into the hall, you thought you saw a smile across his lips, and you sighed, content.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shoutout to writers block for the late updates >:( 
> 
> But if y’all are interested (shameless self promo ahead) I am finishing up a Zuko/Reader (aged up of course) smut fic, that’s also a reason for such late updates haha
> 
> Enjoy this weeks chapter!

Edward wouldn’t meet your eyes all morning after the evening before. At first, you assumed he was just being moody, but it went on for awkwardly long. Unbeknownst to you, he had been sneaking glances at you since they left the dining hall.

He knew it was dumb to be so caught up over a girl leaning her head on his shoulder, it was a childish thing to be worked up over, but he felt really... Touched. Metaphorically.

Nobody had been so gentle with him, at least not in that way, since before his mother died. It felt good, he felt cared for and comforted in a way that only someone much closer than a friend could provide.

Best friend? Ed thought, watching you make a joke to alphonse about something, the way your lips curled when you smiled..

Well, we have known each other for a long time. Yeah, best friend makes sense. He thought.

But, to him, that didn’t explain why his chest felt tight when you smiled at him, or when you touched him it felt as though your fingers were branding him. Or why when you cried it felt like his whole world was shattering, or when you laughed it made his heart skip a beat.

Maybe she just has really warm hands. Edward thought, now guiding the three of you back to your rooms in the barracks. That makes sense. Yeah.

“Do you think something is wrong with Edward?” You murmured to Alphonse, watching the blond shuffle up the stairs a few paces ahead.

“I’m sure he’s just thinking about Doctor Marcoh’s research,” Alphonse replied, sensibly. “We have to visit the First Branch of the library today to try to track it down.”

You nodded, eyeing Edward quizzically.

Did you overstep the night before? All you had done was lean on him, he did seem tense.. What if he was angry at you? You thought, but quickly tried to supress those anxieties, as your trio arrived at your designated rooms, Edward still seemed deep in thought, you poked the middle of his back, he jumped, whirling on you.

“Hey!”

You tried poking him again, only for him to dodge your attack.

“You are so zoned out, we were worried you’d never come back to us.” You laughed, attempting to poke him again.

He dodged again.

“Just... Thinking about the research— Stop that!—“ You tried to poke him again, he swatted your hand away. “— We have to stop by the library.”

Alphonse shuffled noisily.

“We should be going soon, brother.” He said, pointedly. 

You grinned at him and raised your hands, wiggling your fingers. Alphonse dodged a poke at the side, he said your name, holding up his hands.

“What are you—?” He started, but was quickly cut off by the echo of the ‘clank!’ sounding from the center of his chest.

You yelped, but laughed cradling your finger with your other hand. “Sorry, Alphonse, I didn’t want you to feel left out, but maybe it wasnt such a good idea.”

Edward pinched the bridge of his nose, eyebrow twitching. Al fussed over you while you frowned, showing your pink fingertip.

“It’s alright.” You said, a wide smile adorned your cheeks. “My wax wings just melted.”

Edward’s stern, annoyed gaze met yours, softening, just enough for you to notice, before turning to his door and spitting, irritably;

“Let’s just get changed and get to the library.”

You and Al shared a knowing glance and hurried off to your respective rooms.

The pile of ash before the three of you was definitely a mood killer. You could almost feel the rage steaming off Edward, Alphonse stood completely still.

“It’s gone!?” Ed finally spoke, hands flying to his hair, pulling tightly.

“It burnt down the night before last.” A soft voice informed. 

You turned, along with the boys, to meet two uniformed officers, and the gargantuan officer from before— Major Armstrong, you remembered— The shorter one who, you assumed, had spoken a moment before was a young woman with a short black pixie cut; the other a slightly taller man with long dirty blonde hair. 

“Who are you?” Ed asked, you glared at him, mouthing ‘be polite!’ before turning back to the three officers.

“This is Lieutenant Ross and Sergeant Brosh, they’ve been assigned to accompany you until we have the Scar situation attended to.” Major Armstrong boomed, his voice seemed to carry across the whole city.

“Babysitters!?” Ed exclaimed, covering his face with gloved hands, he groaned.

You lightly punched his side, he hissed and glared at you. “They’re just going to make sure you’re taken care of! Is this how you always talk to other officers?” You questioned in an exhasperated whisper.

Edward rolled his eyes.

“It’s only for the time being,” Major Armstrong interjected. “It’s simply to ensure your safety.”

Your dream, specifically the yelling and the booming, suddenly flashed through your mind and you shifted uncomfortably. Jokes aside, it sounded really serious, and if the boys were in danger by whoever this Scar guy was...

You pursed your lips, deep in thought. If Ed and Al are in so much danger, just walking around their city, should you have stayed in Resembool? You knew Edward and Alphonse wouldn’t let you get kidnapped or anything, but if they’re being hunted by some guy with a freaky name like Scar— which definitely made you a little anxious, who names their kid Scar?— Would he... Use you as leverage? No, no, that’s ridiculous. You shoved that thought away.

A sharp metal elbow to the ribs made you wince and glare at the owner of said elbow. Edward mouthed ‘now who’s being impolite?’ sticking out his tongue, you sneered.

“— Used to work in the First Branch and was well aquainted with its materials, perhaps she could be of some help.”

Edwards head snapped towards the female officer— Lieutenant Ross— mouth agape.

“Do you think she would be able to help us, brother?” Alphonse muttered, childlike excitement laced his voice.

“Only one way to find out.”


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one is a little bit all over the place, I’m working on a couple other fics at the moment so I’m juggling a little, hahaha, I hope you guys enjoy!

The uncertainty of this whole situation made Edward feel uneasy. He tried to feel confident in Sheska’s abilities with photographic memory, but there really was no guarentee, and that’s what scared him.

It’d been days since their visit with the mousy girl helped open a new door, a lead, something the Elrics felt they hadn’t had in a long time; though, in the back of Edward’s head, he knew that you may have some of the answers about the Stone or even some kind of alchemic knowledge that could help them. He mentally cursed himself for feeling so anxious about asking you.

“Brother.”

Edward mumured a quiet “what?” and blinked, facing the suit of armor.

“I asked if you had found anything.”

“No, not yet.”

They’d been pouring over the recipes Sheska rewrote for them, trying to decipher the message underneath it all. Nothing seemed to be working, and as much as Edward liked having you there, not that he’d admit it aloud, you had little knowledge of alchemy, so you didn’t want to bother the experts, instead hovering nearby and reminding them to take breaks.

The door opened revealing your form, carrying two water bottles, a book trapped under your arm. You gently placed the sealed bottles on the desk, mindful of the papers strewn across the surface, and plopped into an armchair.

Edward glanced at you, book propped open on your knees. Your hair was loosely pinned out of your face, wearing your usual blouse and skirt, your eyes danced across the page. He blew air out of his nose and turned back to the pages before him.

“Any luck?” You suddenly asked, pretending not to notice Edwards extended glance your way.

“No, we’re stuck,” Alphonse muttered, holding up a sheet of paper with a bulleted list scribbled in black ink. “We got some of it figured out.. But it’s taking a while.”

“And you’re looking for how to make the Philosophers Stone in that doctors notes, still, right?”

Edward eyed you suspiciously, you rose from your seat, turning one of the pages towards yourself, hands on the desk. He tried to ignore how your hair fell over your eyes and cheeks, like a curtain.

“Well, actually, I did want to ask—“

“Right here, wouldn’t this be rubedo?”

Edward scoffed. “What? I just looked over that, where did you see—?”

You rolled your eyes. “I’m not as stupid as you think, Edward. This here—“ You pointed to a passage on the recipe for roasted pidgeon. “— This means rubedo, the yellow color—“

“I know what rubedo is.... And I know you’re not stupid.” Edward muttered, avoiding your eyes.

“Here.” Alphones slid a paper towards you. “This one would be albedo right? Whiteness.”

You skimmed the page, nodding. “It’s talking about the Magnum Opus. Do you have nigredo and citrinitas?”

Edward grabbed the paper out of your hands, sliding the one facing you towards him. “How did we miss that?”

“Well, you two have been at it for days now, and I’ve hardly seen you rest.” You crossed your arms. “And you snap at me whenever I tell you to take a break.”

Edward muttered an apology, barely listening, he could practically see the equations roll off the page and flutter around the room; his mind speeding through equations, scribbling them in the margins of the paper.

You sighed, placing your hands on your hips and turning to face Alphonse.

“I’m going to go to bed. He isn’t listening.” You laughed.

Al nodded, armor clinking.

You gathered your book and water bottle, gently shoving the other closer to Edward, and stepped into the hall.

Leutienent Ross rose from her seat beside the door, offering a pleasant smile.

“They’re still at it?” She asked.

“Yeah.” You glanced back into the room fondly before shutting the door, “Could I get an escort to the barracks? It’s getting late and I still don’t really know my way around yet.”

The brunette nodded, muttering something to her partner before leading you down the hall and out the building.

The next morning, you and Ross chatted idly the whole way to the library, stepping inside the cool building and towards Ed and Al’s private room.

She was in the middle of telling you some anecdote when a frustrated yell and loud crash echoed through the empty hall. Quickly picking up pace, Brosh already standing in the open doorway, you rounded the corner into the room, sucking in a breath.

The desk was toppled, papers strewn across the floor and chairs, Edward sat under the window, gripping his hair, Alphonse mirroring his pose on the adjacent wall.

You rushed over to the boys, first crouching to Ed’s seated position, gently wrapping your arms around his wrists to coax him into releasing his hair. To your surprise, he obeyed, hands instead balling into fists at his side.

You turned to Al, placing a comforting hand on his cold metal forearm.

“What happened?” You asked no one in particular.

Edward gritted his teeth, avoiding your eyes.

“The Philosophers Stone is made of human souls.”

You sucked in a breath, trying to wrap your mind around it, feeling a jolt in your chest, you leaned back and fell onto your rear, pulling your hands into your lap, you smoothed your skirt.

“To make even one stone you have to sacrifice multiple human lives.” Alphonse muttered.

The room felt covered under a dark shadow, a sickening feeling creating cement-thick tension. A stillness overtook everything, the only sound you could hear were your own breaths, shallow. Your head was spinning.

“Damn it!” Edward groaned, punching the wall with the side of his fist. You winced.

“.... But how could the military authorize something like this..?” Rosh muttered, face completely flushed of color. Ross looked physically ill.

“You can’t tell anyone about this.” Edward spat through gritted teeth. “Pretend you know nothing.”

The ride back to the barracks was silent, the same stillness followed you, the rest of the world seemed muted. Upon arrival, the boys decided to board themselves up in the dark. Trying to get Edward to eat was a whole different story, you’d barely managed to get him to change into something more comfortable, but you knew they had a lot on their mind so you tried your best to avoid being overbearing.

Tonight, you came up from the lobby after dinner, entering the room you noticed they were seated in their usual spots, the room dark. You squinted to find a cracked curtain, stumbling over and pulling it open, dim light from the street below flooding in.

Edward sighed.

“Have you eaten?” You asked placing a book on the table in front of you, the couch sinking under your weight. 

“Not hungry.”

You hummed in reply.

“I see. Have you had anything to drink?”

“No, I’m fine.”

You hummed again, irritably smoothing your hair.

“Well—“

Edward spat your name, snapping his head towards you. “I’m fine. I’m not wasting away.”

You sucked in a breath through gritted teeth.

“I understand you have a lot on your mind, you’ve hit a roadblock, but I’m just trying to make sure you’re taking care of yourself.”

“I’m fine. Just thinking.” Edward muttered, his eyes softening.

Your gaze softened as well, turning to face the window.

“Elric brothers!” Three thuds sounded from the door, a shock it didn’t splinter and break with the force of Armstrongs giant fist.

Ed and Al yelped, you jumped, head snapping to the entrance. The door opened and Armstrong ducked inside, face slick with tears, nearly knocking the nearby closet door off its hinges with the heavy thud of wood against wood.

“I know what the notes said! What a tragedy, to think the Philosophers Stone is built around such a dark secret!” The Major sobbed.

What a drama queen. Ed thought.

Armstrong monologued, blubbering like a baby. Edward noticed Ross and Brosh hiding in the door framed and imagined shooting daggers from his eyes at them, they scowled and quickly sunk out of view. You blinked, meeting Edward’s eyes, something unreadable flashed across his features.

“—The truth can be so cruel!”

The blond’s head snapped to Armstrong, brows furrowed.

“The truth.”

“What is it brother?” Alphonse asked, peeking over the couch.

“Doctor Marcoh. At the train station he said something about the truth within the truth,” He put a thoughtful hand on his jaw, eyes focused, “I didn’t understand what he meant at the time, but now...”

The room felt intense, Edward explained what he found in the research, Major Armstrong managed to snag a small map from somewhere, angular buildings with small labels neatly printed over them. It looked worn, one building, with a label you couldn’t read from your seat, had a faded red ‘x’ on top, something settled in your belly and you shifted uncomfortably.

You decided to just listen to what they had to say, a small voice in the back of your head told you that you shouldn’t be there, you were a civillian after all, but nobody seemed to mind your presence very much. You let your mind wander while the alchemists discussed course of action, thinking of the stone, how it was made. Something about it sat wrong with you, the idea of something that powerful needing human lives to exist was shocking, nausea-inducing, even, on its own, but something told you to file this information away for later. This Doctor Marcoh guy seemed legit from all you heard, so you figured he was somebody the boys could trust, but you didn’t trust state alchemists as far as you could throw one, especially higher-ups like the Major, as kind as he was to you and the Elrics, though especially not Colonel Mustang. You heard stories of him, from your mom, sometimes his name was mentioned in passing between your parents, though you never understood completely why he was so well known, your mothers loathing of the military, especially that of alchemists, rubbed off on you.

You always thought it was ironic, the very thing your mother hated was also the thing she loved most, and out of it she got you.

The sound of heavy footfalls and the crinkling of paper lulled you back from your zoned out state, you looked up.

“Under no circumstances are you to visit this laboratory, Elrics. I know you boys—“

You blinked, rising from your seat. The Major looked your way, but avoided your eyes, like usual, offering a rushed goodbye, he left, Ross and Brosh following closely behind.

“You’re going to that lab aren’t you?” You asked, smoothing the front of your skirt. Everything felt intense, heavy.

Edward avoided your eyes, you started growing irrtated at people doing that to you.

“At least let me come with you—“

“No.”

Edwards mouth was open to speak, but Alphonse beat him to it.

“It’s too dangerous, no.” He said, he sounded more serious than you had ever heard him. “This is getting more serious, and there are too many people that want to hurt us, that could endanger you too.”

Edward seemed just as surprised as you, Alphonse normally a silent follower to his older brother. You frowned, anyways.

“I know you’re just trying to protect me, but it’s just an abandonded lab, I could keep watch or—“

“Fine.” Edward interrupted, holding a hand out to silence Alphonse, who sputtered.

You eyed him suspiciously. “Alright... Let’s go then.”

He made an “after you” motion with his arm, you shuffling towards the door.

Before you could even reach to touch the knob, two strong hands clapped your shoulders, Alphonse opened the closet door, and you were shoved into mothball scented darkness.

You felt for the doorknob, anger bubbling in your stomach. You heard something sliding across the floor and tap against the door, you assumed it was a chair, and upon finding the doorknob, it wouldn’t budge.

“You stupid bastard! I’ll kill you, Edward!” You snapped, hitting the door.

You recieved no reply, sitting on the cold wood floor and growling.

“That idiot is going to get killed.”


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you guys enjoy this chapter! I feel bad for having such late updated, and I was motivated, so I decided to update a little earlier! I will try my best not to space updates out so much bahaha. Anyways, we got some fluff this chapter for y’all.
> 
> Enjoy!

The quiet darkness of the closet gave you a headache.

You had been sat there for what felt like hours, and the smell of mothballs and dust made you feel dizzy, only making your irritation grow.

“I’ll tear those boys limb from limb.” You murmured to yourself, knees hugged to your chest. Your rear started to feel sore from the wood flooring.

You managed to find a light switch shortly after your imprisonment, illuminating the most boring, smelly and uncomfortable closet you’d ever been locked in. Not that you sat alone in closets often, but if you did, you imagined this was the worst.

You furrowed your brows and smoothed your hair for the upteenth time, a frustrated growl building in your chest, before you could blink you heard the nearby door open, hitting the chair preventing your escape.

“They’re gone?!” A muffled voice shrieked.

“Oh no, oh no, the Major is going to kill us.” Another answered, groaning.

You hopped onto your feet and started banging on the door, shouting.

The screech of wood on wood and the door swinging open nearly made you cry tears of joy.

Ross stood before you, confused and flushed of all color.

“They went to the laboratory!” Brosh cried.

“I’m going to skin Edward alive and turn Alphonse into cutlery!” You spat, stomping out of the closet and furiously smoothing your skirt.

“Cutlery?” Ross murmured, you ignored her, turning on your heel to grab your bag from the armchair across the room.

To be honest, as terrifed of Major Armstrong as she was, Ross felt partly grateful not to be the Elric brothers, something in your vermillion eyes, which alone made Ross uneasy, filled with such sheer anger made her flinch.

You couldn’t sleep at all the night before, being royally pissed off worked as a reverse sleep aid, you realized. Most of all, you were scared, and worried. They were your boys, and they just ran off without thinking into a run down lab?

So when you were told they were in the hospital, you felt rage rise back up, consuming you right up until you opened the door to Edward’s room.

The empty beige walls and white sheets made you feel sick, the kind of weird feeling everyone got in hospitals. Everything was spotless, a small desk shoved into the corner, roses shoved into a vase, the red made you nauseous.

You forced yourself to look at Edward, throat tight and eyes damp.

He was sat up, scribbling on some papers, shirtless, bandages wrapped across his torso and forehead, smaller bandages dotted across his body, his metal arm was still at his side.

Edward looked up, suddenly sensing your presence, and offered a sheepish smile, placing his papers on the bedside table.

Every ounce of anger that was built up overnight, the lecture you rehearsed on the way over, everything, melted away completely, now feeling a pit in your stomach and your eyes burning. You shuffled over to his bed, taking a seat in an empty chair nearby.

He breathed your name, anxiously rubbing the back of his neck.

“Hey..”

You shifted uncomfortably in your seat, smoothing your hair, a small sigh escaping your lips.

“I’m sorry.” Ed murmured. “But it was dangerous and if you had gone— Well, look at me.”

You started feeling choked up, your eyes watering now, tears threatening to spill. You forced down the nauseous feeling rising up your throat.

“You’re hurt.” You whispered.

Edward avoided your eyes, guilt written across his lips. 

“I’m okay.”

Liar.

“My arm is a little messed up.” He finally met your eyes. “I can’t move it.”

You scoffed. “You’re a goddamn idiot, Edward Elric.”

A small smile graced his features, you forced one on in return, fighting off watery eyes.

You smoothed your skirt, eyes dancing across Edward’s face, anywhere but his eyes. 

“You’re a fucking idiot and—“ Your eyes filled with tears and your throat tightened. “And now, you’re hurt—“

Before you could force them back down, hot tears streaked down your cheeks. Chest tight, you cried, hearing a grunt and the shuffling of cloth, your cries were quickly muffled, Edward had wrapped his good arm around you, pulling your head into his bare chest. The watergates opened, and you cried, frantically wiping your cheeks as best you could without bumping his injury. Ed gently pat your back, trying to hide the discomfort his wounds caused.

“You are such—“ You hiccuped. “—An idiot!”

You gently pushed off Ed’s chest, he flinched, and you wiped your eyes and cheeks dry with your sleeves. The blond noticed you were still wearing the same clothes as the day before, his frown deepened.

“I can’t even believe you!” You reeled, breathing shakily, anger returning. “You leave for some run down, condemned laboratory blindly, nothing but your alchemy! You’re injured, your arm isn’t moving and now—! Ugh!”

You sunk back into your chair, hot angry tears falling across your cheeks, making no effort to dry them.

“If it makes you feel any better, I got a crisp slap from Lieutienent Ross earlier.” Ed muttered, his voice awkward and sharp.

You exhaled, now wiping away your tears with your sleeve. “That does, a little.”

You sat on the edge of Ed’s bed, attention drawn to his arm, you lifted his prosthetic by its middle finger.

“It’s really not working?” You asked.

“No,” He laughed nervously. “I can barely move the fingers. Winry is going to give me one hell of a beating.”

“Karma.” You joked quietly, letting his arm fall back onto the bed with a quiet thunk.

Vermillion eyes met golden ones and you felt your chest lurch. Your eyes darted to the bandage on his cheek, blood poking out the side of the bandage, part of the adhesive coming loose.

“Your bandage.” You whispered, leaning closer.

Edward felt your breath fan his cheek, warmth spreading up his neck. You gently flattened the bandage, Ed winced slightly, and you paused, making eye contact with him.

You realized how close you were to him, inches away from his face. A light pink dusted both of your cheeks, Edward opened his mouth to speak, eyes darting around your face.

“Edward Elric!”

The door burst open, a tall lanky man with black hair and glasses sauntered in, a wide grin gracing his handsome features.

You leapt away from Edward, standing at the foot of the bed, face tomato red. You avoided looking at Ed but assumed he looked just the same.

“Lieutenant Colonel!” Edward forced out, you pretended not to notice how shrill his voice had become.

You hoped your face wasn’t as red, despite it feeling burning hot.

“I heard you had a pretty girl visiting you!” The man said, he wore casual clothes and glasses balanced across his nose.

You coughed into your fist, sputtering. The blush returned and you cleared your throat. The officer stepped foreward and eagarly offered a hand, shaking yours forcefully.

“Maes Hughes!” He grinned.

You introduced yourself, hand finally released, and picking at a string on your blouse.

“It’s nice to see you Hughes, but don’t you have work to do?” Edward grumbled, you glanced at him, noting the ever present pink across his cheeks.

“Nope!” Hughes leaned down and muttered; “I gave Sheska overtime—“ He paused. “—I found out you and Alphonse shouldn’t be kept under guard for much longer!”

Edward opened his mouth to reply, but the officer turned back to you and stepped forward, awkwardly close and making intense eye contact.

“You’re the Ishvalan girl I’ve heard so much about!” He said, as though he were just realizing.

You inwardly grimaced, but plastered a smile and nodded.

“Your eyes are brilliant! You know what else is very brilliant—“ Hughes dug into his jacket pocket, Edward groaned loudly. “—My little Elicia!”

His wallet opened in his palm, twelve (you counted) pictures of a young girl and a middle aged woman unfolded. You leaned forward to look at each, and you felt happier with each one you looked at.

“Isn’t she just adorable!? That’s my wife Gracia, and this is the two of them on Elicia’s birthday!” He pointed to various pictures, naming the event in which they were taken.

You beamed, nodding along to Hughes’ ramblings. You had to admit, they were a beautiful family, Elicia looked like the cutest little girl and his wife was certainly beautiful.

While you and Hughes gushed over the pictures, Edward watched you. Your smile was contagious, he found himself smiling softly just looking at you, and your laugh! It was like music. He felt a warm blush rise to his cheeks, again, and tore his eyes away.

What am I thinking? He thought.

But the sound of your laugh brought his attention back, and he couldn’t help but glance at your lips, his mind flashing back to how close you had been only moments before, and the way your breath fanned his cheek, or how even now you smelled like rosemary.

A curt knock at the door pulled his attention and he felt the warmth in his face burn off, but the twirling his stomach was doing started growing hard to ignore.


	11. Chapter 11

Alphonse had made himself scarce ever since the laboratory. Edward didn’t seem to notice his brother's change in behavior, at least, he didn't voice his concerns. He had explained his side of the laboratory story, describing his run in with two people just like Alphonse and the homunculus, Lust. You knew they had been separated, and you wondered what happened to Alphonse to make him so distant.

This afternoon, Al had decided to join you, even if it meant silently sulking on the other side of the room. Edward had just been served lunch, a tall glass of cold milk caught under a constant glare. You had tried to urge him to drink it when it came in, but the blond was a stubborn bastard, that’s for sure.

“If you don’t drink it, you’ll stay short forever, Edward.” You remarked.

“Shut the hell up, you’re one to talk! I’m taller than you!” He snapped, sending you a glare. You felt no real malice behind his words but narrowed your eyes anyways.

You opened your mouth to spit back some witty jab at his height again, but Alphonse beat you to it. He sounded sad, defeated, even.

“Brother, you have a living body, you have to drink it.”

“I don’t have to do anything I don’t want to do.”

Edward took a bite of a bread roll and scoffed, giving Alphonse an annoyed side glance, the suit of armor sat slumped against the fair wall, Al’s eyes trained at the ground. You were curled up into the armchair under the cracked window, reading a book, some copy of an alchemy book from Edward’s nightstand. A breeze gently ruffled its pages, and you looked back up as Edward continued.

“I wish I were like you Al--” His armor clinked as he raised his head.”--Your body is so big, you don’t have to worry--”

“I didn’t ask for this body!” Alphonse shouted, jumping up from his seated position, the door swinging open to reveal Winry.

The room's tension could be sliced with a butter knife. Your eyes bounced back and forth between the brothers and you shut your book, placing it on the nightstand.

“I’m sorry, you’re right. It’s my fault you’re like this, but I’m going to make it right, I--” Edward murmured, his head lowered slightly. You stood.

“That’s what you always say brother, but we’ve gotten nowhere, can you even guarantee you’ll get my body back?!”

“I promise Al, you have to trust me--”

“Trust you? I can’t trust anything anymore! All I have are my memories, but how can anyone prove they’re even real? Remember when you said you had something to tell me? I know what it is now.” Al’s hands curled into tight fists, avoiding the three pairs of eyes all staring at him.

“Alphonse, stop--” You started, stepping forward to touch his arm, but he tore it out of your reach and looked up towards Edward. You stepped back, frowning.

“You weren’t there when it happened.“ Al said your name, angry, and you tried not to let it hurt your feelings. He turned back to Edward. “And you… You created my soul, my memories, you all have been making a fool of me this whole time… You’re not really my brother!”

Silence blanketed the room like a heavy snow, everything dipped in tension. Nobody dared move or speak, you tore your eyes away from Alphonse to Winry, whose wide blue eyes filled with tears. Edward sat motionless, for a moment, before slamming his fists onto the metal tray creating a strange clank, lifting the veil of silence.

“Ed..!” Winry muttered, as if just realizing he was there.

“You’ve felt like this, all this time?” He rose from his seat. “Fine.”

Edward gently wheeled the cart out of his way and started for the door, you started after him silently, following him out, ignoring the officers in the hallway.

Down the hall you could make out Winry shouting at Al, her words unintelligible, and the clang of metal on metal. You followed Edward onto the roof, he had leaned on the railing, looking down over the city. As quietly and gently as you could, you walked over, stood next to him and placed a hand on his left arm. He didn’t seem to acknowledge you.

“Hey.” You whispered.

He nodded, staring straight ahead.

“I know I wasn’t there when.. It all happened. But I’m sure he’s just upset about the laboratory.”

Edward sighed, slouching slightly. You frowned, linking your arm with his, you gently rested your head on his shoulder.

“It will be okay. You’ll get your bodies back.” You whispered, peering up at him through your lashes.

He sighed again, but gently rested his head on your own. Feeling your cheeks heat up, you looked back down, using your other hand to gently pat his forearm. You took this as a good sign.

“It sounded like Winry knocked some sense into him. I’m sure he will be out here any second.” You smiled at him, holding his arm.

Edward still felt angry and hurt, but you holding onto him like this made him feel warm. He tried to avoid the blush rising up his neck, but his brain felt like short circuiting. You had only come to live with Pinako shortly after the incident, your mother had just died, Edward had learned from Pinako a few years ago, and one of your parents knew Winry’s mother and father. You weren’t there when their mom died, you were painfully aware of, but you empathized with them as much as you could, something Edward would never outwardly admit, he appreciated about you.

Ed’s feelings for you were definitely a mystery, as well. He liked your smile and your laugh, he noted, and you always managed to make him feel at least a little better. Edward felt good. His anger towards Alphonse mostly gone, and he wondered how you were able to make him feel so much better, without a real conversation.

His mind flashed back to the Philosophers Stone and all the questions he had for you. His frown deepened.

For another time. He thought.

The sound of the door opening on the other side of the roof made the two of you pull apart, you turned, seeing Alphonse standing in the doorway.

“I’ll leave you two alone.” You said, offering a sympathetic smile to Edward, his cheeks pink.

Stepping past Alphonse you patted his breastplate, smiling at him. He said nothing, but watched you walk into the stairwell, Winry and Hughes meeting you there.

Opening the door to Edward’s room, you and Winry found all the boys huddled around the window, each with their own variation of a scowl painted across their faces.

“Ed?”

“What’s wrong?” You asked, frowning.

Silence. You and Winry shared a glance.

“Well, uh, we got those tickets you asked for.” Winry said, stepping around the bed.

Edward perked up at that, taking the tickets from Winry, he nodded. “Thanks.”

“Where are you boys off to now? You’re barely healed.” Armstrong questioned, he and Hughes peeking over Ed’s shoulder to see the tickets.

“I’ve had enough hospital food. We think with everything going on it’s a good time to visit our teacher.”

The rattling of metal made all eyes turn to Alphonse.

“She’s going to kill us.” He whimpered.

Edward faced his brother, holding his shaky hands. “Don’t you chicken out on me, Al! I’m scared too!”

You and Winry shared another confused glance

“Dublith is quite the journey.” Armstrong remarked, examining a map.

“Dublith?” You questioned, taking a look at the map, Winry following suit.

A yelp right in your ear caused you, and everyone else in the room, to jump. Winry clasped her hands together, swaying back and forth.

“Rush Valley!”

“Rush what?”

“Rush Valley! It’s only the holy land of automail engineering!” Winry looked as though she may cry. “Ed you have to take me!”

“What? Go on your own time!”

You flicked the back of Edward’s head. “If you’re so scared of your teacher, maybe a pitstop would be a good idea. And Winry seems awful excited. She might just kill you if you refuse.” You told him.

He gave you the most evil glare he could muster, but sighed, defeated. “Fine.”

Winry nearly started dancing, exclaiming multiple “thank you”’s before skipping out of the room.

You grinned at Edward, hands on your hips. “And you can’t make me pay for anything because I don’t have any more money!”

Prancing out of the room you shot a wink and a wave at Edward, following Winry into the hall.

Hughes chuckled beside the blond, slapping a hand on Edward’s shoulder, he opened his mouth to speak.

“Shut the hell up, Hughes.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Very sorry for such a long hiatus! I hope you guys enjoyed the chapter, our next one is already in the works :^)


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